Lesson 8 deals with Truth and the main idea was:
“You are tempted every day to believe the lies all around you regarding your marriage. You need to identify the lies you’re choosing to believe and replace those lies with biblical truth.”
If you don’t know by now, there are many times that we believe lies about our spouses intentions or actions. But we need to understand that our enemy, the Devil is always screaming in our minds with what sounds like our own voice lies about our spouse. This lesson deals very practically about this.
“What if God intended marriage to make us holy more than happy?”
Don’t see that on a Hallmark card do you?
“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” Romans 12:2 (ESV)
We need to allow God to change the way we think. Old ways of thinking won’t change our marriage. Nothing changes if nothing changes. Let God transform your “old ways.”
In the book, they asked listed the common lies that we tend to believe about our spouse but then what the truth really is…
Lie: I should feel “in love” at all times
“Love is described by actions rather than emotions…
Oftentimes it is actually the loving actions that will bring about loving feelings.”
Lie: My marital issues and problems are different or unique.
“There are no new or unique problems in marriage.
1 Corinthians 10:13 says, No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man.”
I heard James MacDonald once say, Satan has three strategies to take us down in every area of our life…
“Disguise, Divide and Destroy. He comes to us as an angel of light. He gets us isolated by ourselves, and then he takes us down.”
Lie: I married the wrong person and my “soul mate” is still out there?
“You made a commitment to your spouse and God has joined you together.
Remember Mark 10:7-9.”
Lie: My Marriage shouldn’t be this hard.
“When two sinners marry, there will always be difficulties.”
1 Corinthians 7:28 says:
“But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed woman marries, she has not sinned. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that.”
Not the most positive spin on marriage but it makes the point.
Lie: My Marriage and spouse are supposed to make me happy.
“Real joy comes from God. If you look to your spouse and your marriage
to meet needs that were intended for God alone to meet, it will be exhausting for your spouse, and disappointing and frustrating for you.”
Lie: I can never have a great marriage because there has been so much damage.
“When you sin you may believe that God will withhold His Plan A for your
future and give you His Plan B instead. While there still may be consequences for past actions, the good news is that God is for you, not against you, and wants you to experience the ideal of marriage.”
Psalm 103:10 (ESV) is a great reminder of this…
“He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities.”
The book made this point that I love!
“The truth is your spouse is God’s provision for you, not God’s curse on you.”
James MacDonald made a great point about how to get “unstuck” from the cycle of lies:
You don’t have a good marriage because you want one.
You don’t have a good marriage because you tell people you have one.
You don’t have a good marriage because you can teach a class on how to have a good one…[including re|engage…hahaha!]
You have a good marriage because you work on your marriage.
You want to get unstuck, you have to prioritize your marriage.
As you prioritize and work on your marriage things will improve! But we MUST push out the lies and focus in on what Philippians 4:8 says.
Scripture to Review:
- “Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.” Matthew 19:6 (NLT)
- “Enjoy life with the wife whom you love, all the days of your vain life that he has given you under the sun, because that is your portion in life and in your toil at which you toil under the sun.” Ecclesiastes 9:9 (ESV)
- “Those who despise flagrant sinners, and honor the faithful followers of the Lord, and keep their promises even when it hurts.” Psalm 15:4 (NLT)
If you would like to read the next installment to the re|engage class, click here . . . ★ Re|Engage – Communication ★
If you want to read previous re|engage lessons click here…
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