The main idea of Lesson 2 was:
“Your marriage is broken because it is made up of two broken people. You fall short of God’s standard.”
We enter marriage with the idea that everything will be perfect but when you really think about it, that is a crazy belief. It is impossible for 2 imperfect people to come together and the result be a perfect marriage.
But even though your marriage will never be perfect, it can be great! And it is all about involving God! One of the recurring themes in the class is based on this idea:
For me this is probably one of the best pieces of advice I have ever heard which can apply for not only your marriage but with any aspect of your life. It reminds me of what Jesus taught in Matthew 7:3-5 (NLT)
“And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own? How can you think of saying to your friend, ‘Let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,’ when you can’t see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye.
Paul David Tripp once said, “I am my biggest marital problem”
Do you see that as being true? Or are you operating in the mindset that “if I could just fix my spouse, then everything would be great.” If you are, then I promise that your marriage will never get better. The book nailed it when they said
“The problem isn’t primarily your circumstances or your spouse; it is the selfishness and sinfulness within your own heart. You are broken and have a part in why your marriage isn’t where it should be. Yes, you are a part of your marriage problem.”
Wouldn’t that make a great bumper sticker or Twitter post huh? Not so much right? But here is the great thing…Once you realize your part in the conflict, then there is hope. There is something you can do. Draw the circle and WORK ON YOURSELF! Let God take care of your spouse.
“You are powerless to love your spouse the way you promised you would, the way they dreamed you would and the way God designed that you should.”
Make this personal…as you read this, insert your name:
You are powerless to love your spouse the way you promised you would,
You are powerless to love your spouse the way they dreamed you would and
You are powerless to love your spouse the way God designed that you should.
This is the reality that we all face. The question is, do we accept it or do something about it? Here is the final thought from the book…
“Until you acknowledge the brokenness in your own heart and turn to the One who is ready and willing to help you, your relationship will remain broken.”
“Anyone who listens to my teaching and follows it is wise, like a person who builds a house on solid rock. Though the rain comes in torrents and the floodwaters rise and the winds beat against that house, it won’t collapse because it is built on bedrock. But anyone who hears my teaching and doesn’t obey it is foolish, like a person who builds a house on sand.”
We may all be broken but when we center our marriage on God’s principles and invite Jesus to be in the center of our marriage, anything is possible!!
My pastor shared this incredible diagram that illustrates the brokenness that we all have without Jesus
Our sin is a barrier between God and us. To bridge that barrier God sent Jesus. We have two choices on what we do with Jesus, either we repent of our sin or we continue in our rebellion. If we repent, then salvation will be granted, if not, we will face judgement.
Reflect on this…Psalm 139:23-24
“Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!”
We need to recognize our brokenness and trust in Jesus. I will close with this final advice on how to improve your marriage from the book!
If you would like to read the next installment to the re|engage class, click here…★ Re|Engage – Grace ★
If you want to read previous re|engage lessons click here…
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